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Give Me a Real Man
By S.D. Craig
Published March 2002

Several men have mentioned in comments to me that they are sick and tired of seeing stick-thin women (a la Kate Moss).

Might I describe this wonderful apparition of our dreams for you? That is, after I hug him tight. I’m here to tell you, real men want real live women. Bless country star Trisha Yearwood’s song by the same name—it’s a woman’s anthem if I ever heard one. You got it, about real live women.

A man who just takes the time to understand women has hit the top of my list. I’m talking about a real man that is kind and sensitive to a woman’s needs. He can tell when we’re off a bit (either our day or our rocker) and he knows how to react. That might mean to hide out in the bathroom for a while, or lie us down across his lap and stroke our hair. He’ll know.

That man also loves curves and rounded bellies and affection, plain and simple. And it’s so wonderful when he verbalizes about those curves. My husband does. Let me tell you ladies, that these men don’t want to hold onto nothing. They want a woman of substance. They want to know they won’t crush her when they get frisky.

Romance and touching are a big part of a real man. Romance doesn’t mean wine and roses all the time. A little I love you sticky note on the bathroom mirror on his way out the door can do the trick.

Once, a man did this on my truck windshield on his way to work (yeah, I knew him, you sillies). I was parked at my job, not in the same area at all. This cost him only time out of his day, but meant so much and obviously, I’ve never forgotten that it was special.

And men, don’t scoff and complain that we really don’t want that sense of humor of yours. It’s a top priority. The ability to laugh, either at us (as long as we’re laughing too, of course, and a real man can tell the difference) or with us, works wonders for real live women.

Little surprises are a treat beyond treats. Those unexpected chocolates or a night out to the movies we weren’t expecting (especially valued if he hates going to the movies) rate high. What a way to melt down your real woman. Another way? Give her a massage gift certificate. Trust me, you’ll never forget the night that follows.

Real men open a car door, a garage door, get the keys for you when your arms are loaded full. He’ll note you’re a self-sufficient woman, independent and hard-working, yet he can still find the way to your heart by treating you with respect.

I admit, there can be a fine line between opening our door for us and getting your head bit off for doing so. A real man figures this out. Another important aspect: he has very good timing.

Following that thought, this man also knows when your time of the month hits (a must for his own sanity).

A real man, is, well, sexual. Now, there’s a difference here beneath the sheets, so to speak. Sexual is as sexual does. This does not mean he looks like Brad Pitt or has the charisma of Richard Gere.

It means he knows how to please a woman. He puts her first, in the matters of lovemaking. Aware of what makes her motor run, he does those things often. And in turn, she knows her man and his needs. A real man will talk about sex with you, and not assume he knows everything. A real woman must get over the shyness and talk back.

I believe some couples truly wig out after a while. Remember to do unto others as you’d like someone to do unto you. Never forget that in a love relationship, or any relationship.

Treat that real man like he has feelings. He does. Give him the attention he deserves, the compliments he longs for, the care he needs.

He’ll be sure and reciprocate. After all, you chose a real man, didn’t you? 

Editor's note: Nothing against Kate Moss. She is also a beautiful shape, just different.

About the writer: SD Craig is a freelance writer and editor of LovingYourCurves.com and was given the nickname "Chatterbox" by fellow writers. At age fifty, Craigs Southern flair and sense of humor give her plenty to write about with a rapier wit and a wacky outlook. Her articles on body image (her biggest passion), marriage/divorce and relationships, family, friends, career issues, computers, the Internet, horses, baseball, movie reviews and writing tips remind one of Erma Bombeck or Dave Barry. A freelance writer who once juggled five columns then got real, Craig welcomes your e-mails and feedback on her articles. Drop her a hello at sdcraig922@yahoo.com or stop by www.lovingyourcurves.com.

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