A 70′s dinosaur falls into eDrums.

By Jeffrey the Barak

Before I ever had electronic drums, I spent a couple of decades carrying around large, heavy drum sets and cymbals, which could only ever be played in rented rehearsal rooms, because they naturally made very loud sounds that would never be appropriate in a normal domestic setting.

As loud as real drums are, they invariably require amplification in a loud setting, so not only are there many huge shells and large cymbals with a great deal of heavy, metal hardware to support them, there is a second set of hardware to support the microphones.

But once a decision has been made to replace the drums and microphones with electronic drums, a new option appears. This is the option of a compact format. With real drums, as they have evolved, the standard drum set includes a bass or kick drum, which is on it’s side, on the floor and a hi-hat, which has it’s pedal directly below the pair of cymbals, and is usually therefore placed before your left foot. Typically the snare drum is between the legs with the kick and hat to either side, and then an array of toms and cymbals surround the aforementioned triangle.

But of course, with a remote pedal for the hi hat, an electronic hi hat does not have to be in the usual position. For example, a right-handed drummer does not have to cross arms to get to the hi hat on his left with his right stick. It can be at 2 o’clock of the snare, and still be opened and closed with the left foot. And since we don’t need to have large toms and large cymbals to produce the sounds of large toms and large cymbals, then it starts to make sense to abandon the format and layout of acoustic drums in favor of a small compact array, permanently connected and easily amplified with one or two cables.

In some situations, a drummer will have to mimic the layout of an acoustic kit, either because he switches back and forth from one to the other and wants to avoid adapting back and forth, or because the standard image of a conventional set is assumed to be desired by his band, or his audience.

But for me, if I can have a large ride cymbal sound or a large floor tom sound without having to have those large objects present, then I will happily have a compact layout before me and also take advantage of the ability to play quietly and precisely, and yet still produce all the sound I want. So my electronic setups have started and remained compact throughout and I have little interest in the so called normal electronic kits with their racks and spread apart format.

A legacy of Flipping: How I bought, sold, returned and flipped my way through many eDrum setups.

Towards the end of my acoustic era, I had already eliminated tom-tom shells and had an array of Roto-Toms over two bass drums and a snare. If I could have found a decent double-kick pedal back then, I would not have had two bass drums either.

Shortly thereafter, I stopped playing altogether, but at one point I went to a toy store and got a Yamaha DD-50 with it’s two little foot switches and noisy, hollow pads. That little toy was a lot of fun for a while and I even McGuyvered together a base for the kick trigger that I could strike with a bass drum pedal.

But that was not real. It took eighteen years of being a non-drummer to prepare me for a return to serious playing, and when that time came I began an odyssey of buying, trying and either returning or re-selling various devices

First was an Alesis Performance Pad. Ironically, as you will see, I almost went full circle back to this, but my Performance Pad was returned to the store due to a crackly potentiometer (volume knob). I did not love the sounds that the included drum machine provided and I found the rubber hard and tiring to play on.

Then came a Roland SPD-20, complete with throne, Roland FD8 hat pedal and KD7 kick trigger with pedal. Then came a year of swimming against the current. I got rid of the pedals and sticks and adapted to hand and finger drumming using a Roland Handsonic 10.

I developed a technique whereby I could play bare handed and have the Handsonic sound like a real drum set. I even recorded an album of self-penned compositions using my Handsonic,  and at the same time, having been impressed by the YouTube videos of David Fingers Haynes, finger drumming on a $60 Korg NanoPAD, I got pretty good at doing that also.

But I felt that I was wasting my ability to control a pair of sticks. I wanted buzz rolls and all that comes with stick drumming. So I got a Yamaha DTX Multi 12 and it took me all of a day to realize that I could never get what I wanted from it, and so that led me to the DrumKAT dk10.

The DrumKAT has been around for a couple of decades, and yet unlike a slick mass-produced product from Roland or Yamaha, it remains a specialty product, encased in tough steel, finished with a hammered enamel paint, looking tough and roadworthy, and yet with an air of laboratory roughness. To use car euphemisms, while the Roland and Yamaha all in one drum pads have a refined quality, like a new Toyota Camry, the KAT products, from a little American firm have more the feel of a hand-built British Morgan sports car, or a military vehicle.

I found the DrumKAT to be one of the most playable surfaces I’ve ever taken a stick to. As per my comments on format, unlike a conventional electronic drum set, the DrumKAT puts everything on a tea-tray, right under your sticks. It is a format conducive to flying around the drum  kit, without having to move much above your elbows, perfect for quiet, fast, precise strokes and press rolls with lightweight 7A drumsticks, which with electronic drums, can sound as big and loud as a crazy hard swing on a rock kit with the butt end of a 2B drumming bat. So I bought a full playing setup from Alternate Mode, makers of the DrumKAT. The DrumKAT dk10, with a new Yamaha Kick trigger and a Pintech Hyperhat pedal.

During my DrumKAT period, I had a succession of little problems and issues that eventually led me to finding another way to play. These included an incompatibility with Garageband,which forced me to buy EZdrummer and a Jazz EFX pack, adding to the already high price tag. Then my first dk10 had a faulty pad and it’s replacement arrived with a loose mystery object inside, and then I was okay for a while, but due a faulty pedal issue that was not discovered until later, Alternate Mode assumed that their own product, the dk10, did not provide continuous CC data for the hat, and I wanted the proper hihat control for all that money, not just open and closed, so I invested even more money to upgrade the perfectly good dk10 to the DrumKAT 3.8.  Even though I am attracted to the small format of a pad controller, I have to point out that with the 3.8 instead of the dk10, this setup was now more expensive than most big electronic drum sets from Alesis, Yamaha, and even Roland! And that includes all the pads, cymbals, cables, racks and triggers, and the sound module! But then, that’s what I don’t like about the standard e-kits. Too much stuff, too big, and not logical.

But my problems only grew from here. The control interface of the 3.8 is too difficult for a humble jazz-drummer like me. Even the very comprehensive video help desk movies on Alternate Mode’s website are way beyond any engineering course I would ever sign up for. It transpired that I could not even set up the DrumKAT with Alternate Mode’s Mario on the phone, because my hat pedal was faulty. But then after many hours of attempting to familiarize myself with the interface operation procedures required for using the DrumKAT 3.8, I gave up, and decided to return all to Alternate Mode and make a fresh start. And then a week later, Mario from Alternate Mode called to explain that the dk10 did indeed have a fully controllable hi hat, not just open and closed, and it was only the Pintech Hyperhat pedal that triggered this entire mess.

And the imagined failure of the DrumKAT brought me almost full-circle to the Alesis Control Pad. Yes it is harder and louder like my original Performance Pad of two years prior, and it sure does not feel a quarter as nice as the KAT, and for some reason I cannot yet play a super closed buzz press roll on it, but I could buy a pile of Control Pads for the price of one KAT, so I will somehow adapt to it and make the best of it as the compact playing surface of choice… for now!

I would ideally have the simple interface of the Control Pad with the playability of the DrumKAT. Perhaps a new surface material will…surface.

Jeffrey the Barak is the publisher of the-vu and back in the Nineteen-Seventies, he used to be Jeffrey the Barak.

Living in the cloud

By Jeffrey the Barak

Slowly but surely, more and more of my computer time is moving off my computer and into the cloud. I have a fast business cable connection at home and work, so my cloud applications are usually as fast as my native apps, but today I passed a landmark so now is a good time to rant about it.

Today, Ladies and Gentlemen, I stopped using Microsoft Excel. Excel was the last and only Microsoft product that was in my daily life. I left the Windows world a few years ago to live on Planet Apple, a much more efficient place in my opinion, but hung onto Excel because it was the only product good enough to handle my databases and spreadsheets.

I tried several alternatives such as Numbers, Open Office Calc, Bento, and others, and I tried Google Spreadsheets, many times. As recently as November, Google Spreadsheets, part of Google Docs, failed to handle my requirements, but with the approaching launch of Google’s Chrome Operating System, the G Boys have been hard at it, and now I find it is up to pace with my needs.

So my email, my accounting, my complicated databases and my shopping cart system are all now in the cloud, as are the control panels for my various WordPress sites, including this one, and my shipping modules too. I can find the same daily working environment in any browser on any computer, anywhere there is a connection. With a wide screen and plenty of tabs, it’s all there on my desktop, wherever that might be. It’s quite a strange feeling actually, after two decades of Spreadsheet juggling, but hey, welcome to the future.

The bear eludes me

By Xygore the Word Cop

Allude – mention, or refer indirectly to

Elude - Avoid or escape

You can bear with me, but there is not a bear with me.

You cannot bare with me unless we are nudists.

And yes it’s a sardine. So what?

Xygore the Word Cop is an absolute bastard and he lives near Primm NV USA.

Oceans of Placka

By Jeffrey the Barak

We all know that over long periods of time, land continents move, collide and separate, and oceans take on different shapes. Due to the rotation of the Earth, the positions and sizes and shapes of the continents have a significant effect on ocean currents.

In today’s world, the positions of the continents contribute to today’s ocean currents. There are five major rotational ocean currents on the globe today, known as gyres.

There have always been gyres, but only in today’s human dominated world, have the gyres also become garbage patches. Vast areas accumulating man-made marine flotsam.

The pollution in these areas consists mainly of floating chemical sludge, suspended plastic and other debris. Much of it can be seen from ocean-crossing boats, but for what we can see there is many times more of it that we cannot see. Some floats at the surface, and most floats below the surface at various depths.

There could be more than a hundred million tons of garbage in the North Pacific gyre alone. It does not all fall off ships. In fact, most cities in the world are situated on river systems, so a morsel of plastic thrown in the street in the Western USA or West of the Andes, or in Japan or Eastern Russia, can be carried by rain and streams and rivers and eventually take it’s place in the gyre in about five years.

Larger pieces are eaten by birds and fish and mammals. We find them in the stomachs of the dead. But as the plastic breaks down into smaller pieces, it works it’s way down the food chain. Even plankton, at the very base of the food chain, can ingest objects from the garbage patch.

So that plastic fork that we threw away in 1987 can show up as a trace amount of plastic inside a sausage on the end of today’s plastic fork.

If the plastic disintegrates entirely, it still exists in the form of toxic chemicals like PCBs and polystyrene. The seawater is no longer just water with dissolved minerals, it’s a suspension of man-made objects.

As we find more and more fish and birds with plastic in their stomachs, we also find that non-native species have invaded far and wide after being carried around the world attached to tiny plastic cruise liners.

Eventually we will need to find a way to take the pollution back out of the ocean and bury it deep on land, or we’ll all be poisoned and starving. But all that will take much longer than it took to add this stuff to the water in the first place, and it may even remain impossible forever.