Belief: Step One to Knowing Who You Are

By Matthew David Ward

In this short rant, writer Matthew David Ward shares with us this stage in his personal development. He is expressing the realization that he is free to believe whatever he determines to be the truth, regardless of pressure from those around him.

I guess the first step in self improvement is to figure out who you are and what you believe. Without knowing yourself how can you improve? So, in spite of living in a Bible-thumping, George W. Bush loving area, I tend to be in the minority and walk against the grain. I have a very complicated view on organized religion. But, basically, I believe it does good in the sense of fellowship, support and peace it provides to the congregation. Once it gets into the “I’m right, you’re wrong” area, I part ways. I have nothing against any religion, but I don’t buy into any of them either. I’m completely satisfied with my own spirituality separate from the organized religions. And don’t get me started on King Bush II.

I also seem to be in the minority in my area when it comes to my stand in gay rights. I’m not a homosexual myself, but I do believe they should have more rights than they get now (be able to marry, at the top of the list). This is the main reason I am very supportive in separating church and state (the Christian bias in the law seems to be the main reason given why homosexuals shouldn’t be allowed to marry). We live in the “Land of the Free” yet we still ostracize certain groups of people. We do it with so many groups and it’s really sad. I’ll just add a note that it happened with slavery and we finally got past that (for the most part). I’ll step away from this subject since I could go on and on.

I tend to develop my own beliefs and thoughts. I got this way from reading a lot and trying to understand others. The fact that I wasn’t raised in a religious household or background allowed me a more open view. We are all human beings after all. No one better than the other. We’re all fighting the same damn fight, but we’re still holding and pushing each other back. I don’t want to be part of that. There’s already too much hate, prejudice and anger in the world.

I used to back down when people asked me what I believe or thought because I was always in the minority. I came from Eastern Kentucky (not necessarily the most open minded area) to the heart of Bush Country. I think I used to believe my opinion counted less than someone else’s as if their beliefs were always one step ahead of mine. This is a dangerous way to think and I’m beginning to allow myself the knowledge my opinions and beliefs are just as valid as everyone else’s. So, only in accepting and standing by what I believe will I actually be able to grow as a human being. Maybe this has been what has been holding me back for so long?

Matthew David Ward is a 21-year-old college student who currently makes his home in Tennessee with his beloved border collie. He is an amateur poet and writer. He currently shares his opinions and thoughts via his webblog, The World As I See It (http://matthewward.blogspot.com).

Scooterer Stories – Part Five – Ein Gedi

Scooterer Stories
By Louis the Scooterer

The travels of Louis the Scooterer, a retired former South African who has found an unusual way of getting to know Israel.

Part Five – Ein Gedi

After many hours on top of Masada, ending with a visit to the shop to buy mementos, then a bed “anywhere in any place” is most welcome, and a cup of coffee and a chair under some palm trees is magnificent ! Thats the way it was at the “old hostel”, in the old rustic single-story building tucked away at the bottom of the mountain, and closed in by trees and shrubs and flowers, and in my opinion had “everything”, and was most charming. Also I was happy to meet some young South African volunteers who worked there, who gave me some of their time, and told me how they enjoy working at the hostel, and they also see some of the country.

Obviously, with progress and future planning, and the large groups of Israeli schoolchildren, and tourists from all over the world, that sleep over, eventually outgrew the “too small” premises, and the new sparkling modern building is now in demand.

The new complex has several floors and has elevators, and blends in with the landscape, and the beautiful views of the stark desert scenery is breathtaking, and the design of the building allows the magic scenery to be seen from many vantage points including the large dining-room and many balconies and from the rooms and dormitories as well.

The breakfast laid on in this great dining room has a variety of salads and herrings and cheeses and creams and cereals and breads and everything one eats at breakfast, beautifully laid out.

(On one occasion when I was the only person sleeping there on a Saturday night, the dining room should not have opened on that Sunday morning, but early that morning, a “plan was made”, and some kitchen staff from Ein Gedi Youth Hostel, drove down and prepared for me this breakfast, truly fit for a king, and attention like that can never be forgotten.)

Every meter and every minute the scenery changes, and every photo taken is a fantastic picture, whether in the shimmering heat of summer, or in the gray dark cloudy days of rainy season in winter.

On to Ein Gedi SPA where I gave myself a treat, and spent a few marvelous hours in the indoor facility that has sulfur pools and resting lobbies and indoor pools with more resting lobbies, and you hire a towel and a locker and “everything” is available including a shuttle-bus that took me close to the Dead Sea water, where I swam, ooops sorry, I “floated” on the hot salty water and then covered my body with black mud for a while then showered at outdoor showers, and traveled the shuttlebus back to the complex. More indoor swimming and pampering and more resting, then something to eat in the cafeteria.

Then on the road again, another few kilometers to Ein Gedi. ( Kibbutz, Youth hostel, Field School, Public beach, gas station and the MANY places to visit in that area).

Ein Gedi is an area I suppose can be described as a “world of its own”, and has Ein Gedi Kibbutz, well known for beautiful botanical gardens, beautiful sparkling blue swimming pool, and top market hotel accommodation, and is built high up on a ridge and has beautiful views in all directions.

At the Sea, a well looked after public beach and public amenities, restaurant, gas station and picnic spots, and all main tourist buses stop there, and people sit in the shade and eat their picnic meals. Then on the opposite side a few hundred meters into the valley, is David’s Stream with waterfall, and close by is the ancient Synagogue with original mosaics, and many ibex that perch on the rocks, and Ein Gedi Youth Hostel and Ein Gedi Field School.

ALL of these places have many stories, but here I try to give a couple of “must” tips…
1). A must, is take a walk to the waterfall and take a plunge under the falling water and shout loud that you “love it” while the ibex watch you !
2). A must, is a visit to the Field School behind the Youth Hostel which has a museum and a beautiful large lawn from where you can “drink-in-the-scenery” while the ibex watch you early in the morning when they walk on the lawns as though they own the place.
3). Another must is a swim/float in the Dead Sea at the Ein Gedi public beach.

I spent 2 nights at the Youth Hostel in Ein Gedi, and had 2 breakfasts in the bright airy dining room that looks on to the Dead Sea, also built in a beautiful setting, and very popular with tourists from overseas, and having seen and visited many stunning places including the waterfalls and the kibbutz gardens, and the Ancient Synagogue, and other interesting places and viewsites.

I then decided to go and “have-a-look” at the Field School above the hostel, a beautiful place in the mountain, lovely views and shady trees on a large green lawn and benches to sit on. When I learned that they also have hostel type room accommodation, I immediately booked-in for 2 nights.

A couple of highlights were meeting a group of students from Haifa University, 4 fellas and a girl who invited me to have coffee with them, and they told me many interesting stories about themselves. One chap, Dani had previously worked in a main tourist hotel and was given a “travel book” by a visitor who was checking out. Dani posted that book to me as a gift, and I consult that excellent gift often.

Later a group of Christians from South Africa, who were touring Israel [ in a 55 seater bus and a 14 seater minibus ] put on their colorful”Lesotho outfits” and did some “African folk-dancing” on the magnificent lawns of the field-school grounds, while the ibex family stood at cliff-edge watching them dancing and singing.

I was there with a young chap, Warren, from S.Africa who was working as a volunteer at the Youth Hostel, who earlier persuaded me to take a slow walk to the waterfall, and play in the water, while the other ibex family watched us. After watching the dancers, Warren and I were invited to join the group at the EIN GEDI beach and to share their lunches, so we had about 6 lunches with different small groups.

And the pleasant “happenings” just continue, coz later that evening another invitation to go with a couple (sister and brother ) to see the “Masada at night – light and sound” show, a very long drive through Arad to the “back of Masada” to see this excellent “show”, from this large outdoor “theater”. The show is on only once-a-week, and is with lights and sounds and smoke, and with the headphones in English giving the full description. Then the long drive back. And that’s how the stories grow, AND THAT IS HOW THE DAYS FLY BY.
At every place I chat with the workers and office staff and local tourists, and tourists from all over the world, and every chat is a story, and all these wonderful stories would take hundreds of hours to relate.

Has anyone been to Metsokei Dragot ?

I saw the sign on route 90 a few kms north of Ein Gedi, and took a ride up the scenic winding narrow road, a few kilometers to the top, a tiny enclosed area with a few homes and buildings, next to a tower lookout, and incredible 360 degree views of horizon, desert, mountains and Dead Sea.

The place is world-famous for “rough mountaineering”and hard-hiking and snappelling and climbing etc.. I was there to see the sunrise, and did not try to wake any people up for conversation and an explanation. I saw a couple of small children playing, but they did not speak English, SO I knew I would return another time !

My follow-up visit a couple of months later, in the rent car, was on a rainy day and the road was partly under water in places, and visibility was poor, SO I made a U-turn. SO, in my planning, my next visit will be on a sunny day, in the middle of the morning, and I hope to find someone to give me some explanations ?

Something to look forward to.

Louis the Scooterer is 69 years old and it sounds like he’s just getting started.

Beauty Divine

By The Advice Diva

The quest for beauty, age defiance and physical enhancement are at an all time high. The beauty industry, comprised of simple salons to mega-corporate giants, pulls in billions of dollars annually. People are obsessed with making themselves beautiful and more attractive for their own personal satisfaction and so others can see them they want to be seen. Not only do people search for ways to enhance themselves, but they also seek beauty and attraction in other things, most notably a dating partner.

Some people might conclude that canvassing the importance of beauty in the dating world is a bit gratuitous. We all know its out there and it can even be considered nature’s cruelest form of sexual selection. You either have it or you don’t. However, I think it is a poignant topic of consideration whether you are just now entering the dating realm or you have been in it for years and whether you are male or female. Today’s society places heavy weight on good looks in the work place and in social scenes. You can’t escape it and you can not deny it. Amidst growing liberties, democracy, the abolition of racial and religious oppression and the rising demand for an open mind one would naturally assume that our advanced culture would not treat certain individuals better simply because of advantageous genetic facial features. But we all know that this is the furthest from the truth. We see it every day.

Doctor Nancy Etcoff, a faculty member of Harvard University and a psychologist at Massachusetts General Hospital, has beautifully illustrated the ageless hunt for beauty in her book Survival of the Prettiest. I was enthralled with the hundreds of references throughout history Dr. Etcoff found and adapted to the importance of beauty. One of the most interesting ones involved Eleanor Roosevelt. When asked if she had any regrets she remarked that she only wished she had been prettier. To hear a statement such as this coming from a heroine to women everywhere, it makes one want to examine why and how being beautiful or handsome plays such a dubious role in our every day lives. As Dr. Etcoff examines this very thought further in her book, I think it would be best if we just accept our idealistic qualities and move on to facing them.

When it comes down to selecting new single men and women we choose to date, our very first assessment of the potential mate is based on looks. Most people will say that they are looking for more profound qualities such as character, motivation, sensitivity, a commonality in activities, beliefs and a sense of humor and that looks, although important, are not at the top of the list. Of course everyone wants to feel as if he or she had more noble intents in mind. And although this may be true, nature tends to sway our first choice. Psychological tests upon tests show that we all gravitate towards the more attractive person at first. This is not something that we can readily help, nor can we consider it malevolent behavior. It is simply programmed into us from commercials, magazine ads, celebrities and more. It is a learned responsive behavior. While not everyone looks like Naomi Campbell or Brad Pitt and there are only a few genetic anomalies in this world who apparently represent what we all should look like, we can all take steps and measures to improve the way we look and how we appear to others. It is the very first rule in dating!

The first person you need to impress is yourself. When you look good you feel good. Take advantage of what modern science has created in the field of beauty. From getting the basic proper shampoo and conditioner for you hair to hair regrowth products and surgery, from makeup to enhance your features to elective surgery for more dramatic effects. Your wardrobe should be a priority issue as well. If you are still showing up at the door to pick up your date in those same ripped jeans you have had since the 1980’s, think about a complete wardrobe overhaul. Getting in shape is an absolute must. Not only does it show that you care about your body, it is essential for your health and it will help you to feel great physically and emotionally. The better you feel about yourself, the more confident you will appear. And confidence is a very sexy and appealing part of your overall appearance.

In her book Dr. Etcoff assumes that people, mostly men, are more attracted to beautiful people for short term relationships while beauty is less important when seeking a committed relationship. However, it is that attractive quality of sex appeal which will get you in the door. When you are just getting to know people for dating purposes such as with the use of online dating resources, your appearance is going to be one of the most compelling forces in attracting dates. Everyone wants someone to fall in love with them for the right reasons, but you can’t change basic human instinct and the natural affinity for beauty. You don’t have to be the most beautiful or most handsome person in the room, but you can take the time and effort to look the best you possibly can.

Copyright 2005 by Advice Through Experience. For more information visit

For questions and comments contact The Advice Diva at: thediva@advicediva.com Please visit www.advicediva.com for more articles by the Diva